This is a continuation of the Cultivating Beauty post, Part One of which looks at what we find beautiful in a person.

Originally I was going to make this a three-part post but I have decided to make a series of shorter posts instead.

One of the most appealing things to me, in choosing people to surround myself with and spend my time with is truth. Not just truth on the basic level that we all think of, but truth on a personal level.

Truth in its basic form is thought of as the absence of deliberate lying. A truthful person is one who does not weave elaborate schemes and tissues of lies.

The integrity of our words is indeed important, and it is rare to find someone who grasps the full meaning of it, but there is something equally as important, if not moreso, than how we use our words with others and whether or not we are truthful with them.

That is whether or not we are truthful with ourself, and whether or not we are truly who we are.

It is easy, and oftentimes even encouraged, in our modern society to fall into the habit of fronting. In other words being something that we are not, or attempting to be someone that we are not, when we are in the presence of other people. Billy Joel sang about this in his song “The Stranger.”

It is a fault of the Ego that we try to be everything to everyone, fearing that we are always in some way inferior or that our self is an inappropriate thing to be in certain situations.

What is beautiful is someone who is so obviously being themself, no matter whether that may be unpopular or not.

How can you tell these people? Well, they will be the one amongst the crowd who is glowing with confidence. Why? Because when you are truthful about who you are, you tend to feel more comfortable in your own skin.

Someone who is comfortable in their own skin is a joy to be around. Someone who is comfortable in their own skin radiates beauty.

I always feel uneasy around someone when they are giving off that “I am hiding something” vibe. It may only be that they are hiding the fact that they hate my background music, or that they secretly love to walk around their house naked and are peeved that my visit required them to clothe themself.

The point is to be open honest about who you truly are, what your likes and dislikes are and to share your true self with others. To not share in this open and honest manner is to deliberately choose not to have a stronger connection with the people who you surround yourself with. It is to deliberately put up a wall and to not allow them to love you as you really are.

When we feel downtrodden we sometimes may say to ourself, “No one really knows me.” If you feel that way ask yourself if you are being yourself when you are around others.

An even more valuable form of truth, and one that can be most difficult to develop, is inner truth. This is a state in which your inner dialog is honest with you. When your ego voice no longer is predominant and lying viciously inside of your head.

It is to be able to value yourself at all times for what a beautiful, unique and talented individual you really are.

It is conquering the dialog that says, “You aren’t that great. There is nothing special about you.” Or any other number of caustic things that the Ego perpetuates in order to feel superior to the spirit within you.

Try a little exercise the next time that your inner voice says something defeatist, attempting to dash your dreams or your self-esteem: (It will only take 30 seconds.)

Stop whatever you are doing.

Stand or sit still and close your eyes.

Say firmly to your inner voice, “You are not allowed to speak to me like that.”

“What makes you think that you can talk to me so disrespectfully?”

Tell the Ego, “You are not in control here. You only have control when I allow you to.”

And end with, “The spirit is the guide in my life, and that is my will.”

Saying these things out loud is not necessary. But making sure to say them is.

You will notice how much better you feel now that you have taken the energy that you may have put into continuing to beat yourself up and used it to defend yourself from negative thinking.

Begin cultivating your own beauty by endeavoring to be yourself, lock, stock and barrel, no matter what situation you may find yourself in.

In the end it makes everyone feel better, to know that you are what you are and nothing else.

And people who feel good are beautiful.

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